


The Departmentalizing Resonance

by sampenning



Category: The Big Bang Theory (TV)
Genre: Ambiguous Implications of Polyamory, Coda, Episode: s10e03 The Dependence Transcendence, F/M, Gen, Internal Monologue, Multi, POV Bernadette
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-05
Updated: 2016-10-05
Packaged: 2018-08-19 15:51:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8215459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sampenning/pseuds/sampenning
Summary: Bernadette realises a few things about herself, her husband, and Raj
A 10.03 The Dependence Transcendence Coda





	

**Author's Note:**

> just a quick thing inspired by the most recent episode concerning my personal headcanon that howard, bernadette, and raj are in a polyamorous relationship

_“Raj, why don't I care about anything?”_

_“I'm sorry?”_

_“It's my baby. I-I should care about nurseries and colors, and I don't-- what's wrong with me?”_

_“Well, crime-scene photos near your crib spring to mind.”_

_“I keep waiting to feel excited, but it's not happening. What if it never happens?”_

_“Bernadette, come on, look, you're overthinking this, okay? You're gonna be an amazing mom. Even if you don't believe it, I know you have maternal instincts.”_

_“Once, I was supposed to babysit my brothers. Our neighbor found them naked in the backyard eating crickets.”_

_“Happy and well-fed. You see, that's what I'm taking from that story!”_

//

Long after Raj heads back to his place, Bernadette tries not to think about anything. It’s almost too much to ask of herself.

She’s still high-strung, but not as much as she was earlier. Talking with Raj’s dad helped her to feel better about the feelings- or, well, lack of- she’s been having towards this baby. And this baby, god, she can barely wrap her mind around it. _Pregnant._

She’s a short feminine woman in a hard science field and she’s going to have a baby. She faces enough shit in one day just for the first two-thirds of that sentence, and she can’t help but dread what’ll happen when the baby does come around. She’s had to fight hard and dirty for what she’s gotten and she’s not ready to give it up, even for her own kid.

But it’s hard for her to keep those cloudy thoughts around when Raj keeps up his cheery attitude about everything. He’s just so happy and confident and just damn _proud_ of her and Howie’s little bundle of cells. He even managed to turn her most shameful child-watching experience into something laughable, something happy, something positive.

Raj is such a huge part of their lives, and they’re a huge part of his life too.

She likes having him around, Howard like having him around, and Raj like being around.

Maybe it all won’t be so bad, after all.

//

_“How can you be embarrassed around me? I'm gonna be in the room with you when you give birth.”_

_“I don't think you are.”_

_“You didn't think I was gonna be in your kitchen this morning, yet here I am!”_


End file.
